


Drama in Hotel Valhalla and Bostonian Mishaps (Alex/Magnus)

by OrcusNoir



Series: Orcus Noir's Canon Collection [3]
Category: Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard - Rick Riordan, Percy Jackson and the Olympians & Related Fandoms - All Media Types
Genre: Alex and Magnus are anarchists, Alex being Alex, Alex likes cars, Annabeth Chase is a Good Friend (Percy Jackson), Blitzen and Hearthstone are Dads, Canon Compliant, Canon Continuation, Canon-Typical Violence, Car Chases, Everyone hates governments, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Genderfluid Alex Fierro, Humor, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Magnus Chase is a Dork, Mallory hates the British, Mischief, POV Alternating, POV Third Person, Pop Culture, Post-9 from the Nine Worlds (Magnus Chase), Post-Canon, Post-The Ship of the Dead (Magnus Chase), Post-The Trials of Apollo, Pranks, References to Norse Religion & Lore, Supportive Alex Fierro, The Chase Space
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-14 10:22:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,228
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29294343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OrcusNoir/pseuds/OrcusNoir
Summary: Magnus and Alex's adventures following The Ship of the Dead, featuring Floor 19 being chaotic as usual and Alex being Alex.Includes pissing off the police and local governments.Also fluff and general cuteness.Oh, and chaos.Lots of chaos.
Relationships: Annabeth Chase/Percy Jackson, Blitzen/Hearthstone, Halfborn Gunderson/Mallory Keen, Magnus Chase/Alex Fierro, Samirah al-Abbas/Amir Fadlan
Series: Orcus Noir's Canon Collection [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2151117
Comments: 53
Kudos: 55





	1. Alex Plays Need for Speed, But Unlike Most People, Alex Plays it in Real Life (Magnus)

**Author's Note:**

> YOU HAD ONE JOB RICK. THE JOKE WAS RIGHT THERE!
> 
> Whatever, it let me write this entire chapter.
> 
> Poggers.
> 
> For legal reasons, do not attempt. That is all.

##  **Magnus:**

##  ******Alex Plays Need for Speed, But Unlike Most People, Alex Plays it in Real Life**

Magnus just wanted a nice relaxing day in the Chase Space, well as relaxing as things could be. Normally Hearthstone and Blitzen kept things under control, as they were doing right now. But Magnus still liked to help out whenever he could. Or rather, whenever Hotel Valhalla gave him a chance. Magnus learned that just because he was dead, doesn’t mean he didn’t have things to do. Even after his various adventures in the realms. There were a few things Magnus expected to happen today. Hearthstone bursting into the library, the former office of Randolph, furiously knocking at the door for Magnus’s attention, was not one of them.

Magnus set the book down that he had just picked off one of the dark oak shelves. Concerned, he met Hearth’s eyes as the elf quickly signed to him: _Alex is outside waiting for you. I’d hurry up if I were you._

“Huh? What’s going on?” Magnus asked. He could feel his amulet buzzing. He was pretty sure that Jack also wanted to know what was going on.

Hearth just shrugged. _She said she found herself, but wouldn’t explain what the fuck that meant._ He tugged at his black coat and went back downstairs. 

This just left Magnus even more confused. He made sure the laces on his new, not stolen, converse were tight before heading outside. Magnus stepped out onto the stairs of the Chase Place and looked around, curious as to _where_ his significant other could possibly be. At least the warm August sun was there to greet him. It always felt nice, it was even comforting at times. Magnus kept an eye out for Alex, which given how Alex dressed, should be easy. But this time, Magnus couldn’t find her at ALL. He shrugged, and was about to head inside until a car horn stopped him.

Magnus turned around to see a bright red sports car parked on the curb. How he missed it was beyond him. Magnus made note that the car wasn’t exactly large. It did sport a small wing on the trunk. Now he had even more questions. What was a two-door eighties looking red sports car with black spoked rims doing here? The windows were a bit tinted so he couldn’t exactly see who was driving it, that is until the window rolled down as the horn was honked again. 

“Beep beep motherfucker. Get in!” Alex called out, wearing her usual bright pastel clothing, but was also sporting a pair of gold frame sunglasses that came right out of 1980. Her hair was dyed a different shade of green than usual. A tad darker than last time, but Magnus didn’t mind. Alex looked beautiful no matter what. 

“Uh, what is this?” Magnus vaguely gestured towards the car that Alex was driving. He was a bit taken aback by the fact that Alex could drive and he couldn’t.

“It’s me, now get in.” Alex lowered the sunglasses a bit.

“That just raises even more questions.” Magnus shook his head and went over to the passenger side door before getting inside. The interior was sorta cheap looking, but at least the air conditioner was on as the car was unusually warm behind the seats...for some reason, it wasn’t like the heat bothered him. The radio was currently playing some older rock songs by Van Halen. Panama, if Magnus’s memory was to be believed. He never really minded this type of music. Somehow the song perfectly fit the car that Alex had _somehow_ gotten.

“So what do you mean that this is you?” Mangus asked, slipping his seatbelt on.  
  
“The name Maggie.” Alex pointed to some stitched letting in the beige leather by the glovebox that said _Fiero_. “Alex Fierro in the Pontiac Fiero. A match made in heaven.” 

Now Magnus was even more confused, there was a car that shared the same name as his partner, and he somehow never heard of it until now? 

“You probably have a million questions for me. Don’tcha?” Alex laughed as she turned the radio down a bit.  
  
“That’s an understatement. First off, where did you find this?” Mangus asked, fixing the seat belt strap so it wouldn’t cut into his neck as much.

“Junkyard.” Alex put the car in drive and pulled out into the street. “Thing was in perfect condition outside of the engine. So I uh...found Randolph’s scrapped BMW.” Alex chuckled to herself.  
  
Magnus’s stomach flipped over a few times like a pancake being made by an overly enthusiastic chef. “Alex. What did you do?”  
  
“So his BMW was mostly fucked outside of the engine right? The suspension was completely ruined. So I uh, got some funds and had some mechanics put that engine in this tiny thing. That’s why it’s a bit hot behind us.” 

“I don’t even want to know where you found his car in the first place. But, what do you mean by it’s a bit hot behind us?” Mangus turned to look behind him, but all he could see was the rear windshield and cars behind them.

“The engine Maggie. The Fiero is a mid-engine car. The engine sits behind us.” Alex shook her head and changed the radio station a few times, trying to find something decent. Or a channel that wasn’t playing commercials.

“Thing had a tendency to catch fire. Won’t happen to us. Not with that 400 horsepower BMW V8.” Alex started to laugh as she started to head towards the on-ramp.

Magnus never really cared for cars all that much, but he had no idea that Alex knew so much. Though he questioned if Alex only knew this much because of the car’s unusual name. 

_Did Alex just mention that this thing has 400 horses? That’s a lot of neighs eh? But, where are they?_ Jack spoke in Mangus’s mind with a laugh. 

_Yes, but she said ENGINE Jack, not actual horses._ Mangus responded, he wondered why Jack thought there were actual horses.

_Oooooh, yeah that makes a lot more sense. My bad._ Jack laughed again.

“Hey Maggie? Watch this.” Alex said before flooring the accelerator. Which promptly left Mangus’s heart, stomach and other various internal organs behind.

The Fiero had a stupidly fast acceleration. Magnus had to admit that it was kinda _fun._ In a weird sort of way. He trusted Alex behind the wheel more than he did Randolph. He looked out the window and found it odd how quickly the cars next to them were passing them by. He decided to check the speedometer, curious to see if his mind was playing tricks on him.

Magnus had several questions now. 

One, where did Alex learn to drive like this? Two, why was Alex going over 100 miles per hour on the freeway? And three, why was he perfectly okay with this?

“You know. Now I have several more questions.” Magnus piped up after a second.  
  
“Oh I know. Question, do you wanna piss off the cops?” Alex asked with a devilish smirk and laugh.

It was a dumb question. Alex knew the answer to the question. Magnus knew the answer. It was always: yes. The two of them bonded over general anarchy. The very existence of the Chase Space has gotten them unfriendly visits from Boston’s “Finest” more times than Magnus can count. Even though the entire operation is legal, the police would often come up with bogus and often completely made up reasons to get a warrant to search the entirety of the building. Nothing ever came up, but it wouldn’t stop them from harassing the various homeless kids that were staying the night or getting a warm meal. Every time it happened Magnus felt a burning rage within his chest, it scared him sometimes. But, Alex understood it. The two of them would often blow off steam in Hotel Valhalla by either smashing pottery or playing video games together.

“You know what I’m going to say.” Magnus responded. “Anything good on the radio?” He asked.

“Glovebox. Cassette tape. Pop it in.” Alex pointed to the radio. “Hurry. I didn’t find a Windows 98 computer for nothing.”  
  
_Why would you need a Windows 98 P.C to make a cassette tape?_ Magnus thought. _Weird reason to get one. Gotta ask to use it later._

Magnus popped open the glovebox and grabbed the lone cassette tape and slid it inside the player. What started to play wasn’t what he was expecting. He was expecting some older rock music, maybe Metallica. He wasn’t expecting some weird techno music to start blasting from the car’s speakers.  
  
“WOOO!” Alex screamed. “LOOK BEHIND US MAGGIE! We got them!” Alex bit her lip in excitement. “This is gonna be fun. Stupid Crown Vics.”  
  
Magnus looked in the rear view mirror. Sure enough they had gotten the attention of a lone cop. Who was currently chasing them. The police cruiser seemed to be having trouble keeping up with them. Magnus was thankful that there wasn’t a lot of traffic today. Not that getting pulled over would be an issue. Alex would just shapeshift a bunch to confuse the poor mortal’s mind as they made a getaway. Wasn’t the first time that Alex had to do that. Nor would it be the last.  
  
“No shit!” Alex called out again. “Just hit 120. Nice. How fast do you think we can go?” Alex asked, her voice had a slight shake to it. Probably from her nerves and excitement.  
  
Magnus didn’t know. All he could focus on was the blaring sirens behind then, the way the entire car was shaking from the speed, and the various tiny bumps that could be felt.  
  
“LOOK AT THAT! THEY GOT THE NEW CARS ON US!” Alex screamed with a laugh.  
  
Magnus turned around in his seat just to see the aggressive looking grill of some muscle car. “Shit, I don’t think we can outrun that!” He called out, turning back around. His heart started to beat rapidly in his chest. Things were starting to pick up now.  
  
“Good call! Gonna do something stupid!” Alex took a deep breath. Magnus could tell Alex was going to turn around to the other freeway and head back into Boston by using one of those emergency lanes that cops liked to hide in.  
  
“HOLD ON!” Alex pulled over to the side of the road and slammed on the breaks. If Magnus wasn’t wearing his seatbelt, he would’ve been stuck to the dashboard. He watched the police cruisers fly past them as Alex turned onto the other freeway. She floored the accelerator again.  
  
“GET FUCKED!” Both Alex and Magnus started to laugh hysterically. He watched in the rear view mirror as the two cop cars nearly crashed into each other trying to slow down. Alex started to giggle to herself.

“That was great. HAHA! We should do that more often.” Alex said. “Serves them right for-” She shook her head and punched the gas again. “We got another behind us.” The loud sirens started to overpower the techno music that was still playing.  
  
“Fuck! Any ideas?” Magnus asked. He wasn’t concerned about the cops at all. Though there was a small part of him that was a bit scared.  
  
“I got one. Watch.” Alex got on the off ramp to Boston. She had to drive on the side of the road to avoid some cars. Yet the cop still followed them. Alex cursed and turned the Fiero sharply to the left, which sent Magnus’s head into the window. The pursuing police cruiser couldn’t make the turn at such speeds, and was instead sent right into the stop light pole with a loud bang.

“FUCK YOU!” Magnus called out in joy. It was certainly a cathartic feeling watching that unfold, that didn't help his heart rate, but was still nice...he knew the cop inside was fine, as the door opened and the officer stepped out of his damaged cruiser with his radio in hand. 

“Let’s ditch this ride Alex.” Magnus said, turning the techno music from an unknown source down a notch.  
  
“We are. There’s a parking lot nearby.” Alex rounded the corner quickly and drove right into said parking lot. She parked the car in the far back of the lot, which was situated between two brick buildings.  
  
“Gonna leave the keys. They can’t trace it back to us no matter how hard they try. All they’re gonna get are the fingerprints from two dead teenagers.” Alex shut the car off after taking the cassette tape out. “Come on, let’s get the fuck outta here.” 

The pair quickly left the area on foot whilst blending into a crowd of random people as the near deafening sound of sirens filled the area. They walked in near silence, until the siren noise started to become faint.  
  
“Well, that was something.” Magnus spoke first. He decided that this random dollar store would be the perfect place to stop. His heart stopped beating so rapidly after a few seconds.

“I’ll say, I’m surprised you weren’t screaming your head off.” Alex laughed. “That was fun as all hell. We should do that again.”  
  
Magnus shrugged. “We kinda need a car to do that with y’know?” He started up down the sidewalk again. Alex decided to wrap her arm around his waist on their walk back to the Chase Place. Despite not liking touch all that much, Magnus was okay with this. The pair chatted about random things and future plans that they wanted to do. Which included messing with the police some more.  
  
It didn’t take long to reach the Chase Place, but before they went inside, Alex paused on the steps.

“Just wanted to get this outta the way before Blitzen sees. Don’t need him going all _“awww”_ on us.” Alex gave Magnus a kiss, which he followed up with his own. Magnus could feel his cheeks get a bit red, but he took pride in knowing that Alex was blushing too.

Magnus opened the slightly heavy door of the Chase Space, only to find Hearthstone and Blitzen standing in the doorway. A disappointed look on full display from both of them.

“So. Mind telling us about this _adventure_ of yours?” Blitzen asked, his hands inside the pockets of his chestnut three-piece suit. 

Hearth shook his head and signed: _come back later, I’ll take care of this._  
  
Magnus and Alex both nodded and walked back out the door, backwards. Not breaking eye contact with Blitzen, who immediately turned to face Hearthstone. A Hearthstone who had the biggest smile on his elf face.

“Well, uh...wanna see what’s going on in Valhalla?” Alex asked, finally taking off her sunglasses.  
  
Magnus nodded while trying not to get lost in her multicolored eyes. “Yeah, I think T.J wants to play Mario Kart or something.”  
  
“Sounds like a plan, let’s go” Alex wrapped her arm around Magnus again as they made their way to one of the many access points to Hotel Valhalla.

While it was a surprise at first to Magnus when he started to date Alex officially. He quickly realized it was meant to be, and he wouldn't change a thing. They got along so well it was almost scary at times, and chaotic days like this just cemented that fact.


	2. Sorry Not Sorry For Causing That Whole Deal (Magnus)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Annabeth figures out what Magnus and Alex got into

##  **Magnus:** **  
** **  
** **Sorry Not Sorry For Causing That Whole Deal**

The two of them got back to Floor 19 in a midst of laughter and cheers. Magnus collapsed onto his king sized bed with tears in his eyes, his mind recalling the look on the police officer’s face after he stepped out of his crashed cruiser. Jack flung off his neck and floated through the air. His runes glowed a few different colors before speaking.

“Where did Alex learn to drive like that?!” The sword asked.

“Uh, video games?” Alex shrugged. He plopped himself down next to Mangus on the bed. 

“Since when did y’all have time for games?!” Jack yelled, still confused. He hovered over to the shelf that had all of Magnus’s game consoles on it, gifts from Hotel Valhalla. “Have these even been touched?!”

Magnus just shrugged. The two of them only really played games together at night if neither of them could sleep or if the other members of Floor 19 wanted in. That’s how it’s always been.

“So that’s a no? So, Alex, where _did_ you learn to pull those stunts?” Jack asked again, hovering in the air around Fierro’s face.

“Then I got nothing for you magic sword man.” Alex muttered nonchalantly while mindlessly playing with Magnus’s blonde hair, which finally grew back out to its former length. While Magnus normally didn’t like people touching him, he still didn’t, Alex was an exception. Alex understood what Magnus was okay with and respected that. It was a huge part of their relationship, and why Magnus loved him so much.

Jack went off about Alex’s driving skills for a few minutes before floating away, claiming that he was late for his date with a spear from Floor 22. Magnus still doesn’t want to know how a sword does dates. All he’s seen Jack do is talk his...mouth?...Runes? Off at random weapons.

With the talking sword out of the picture, Alex grabbed the remote for the now 55 inch plasma TV in Magnus’s room and turned it on. “Last week this was 50 inches. Next month we’re gonna have a fucking projector in here with THX audio.” Alex sat up on the bed.  
  
Magnus sat up next to Alex, but decided to rest his back against the headboard. Keeping his eye tuned to the flat screen. “Didn’t THX go outta business?” He asked.

Alex turned to face Magnus as he flipped the TV on. “Since when?” He raised an eyebrow. Those multicolored eyes drew Magnus in like a black hole to a star.

“Hell if I know, just heard it through the grapevine.” Magnus kept his eye on the TV as Alex flipped through the channels. He stopped by a few news reports of their recent joyride, but decided to ignore it. Alex stopped on a movie channel playing an eighties classic, a movie that Alex basically forced Magnus to watch. The original _Terminator._ Because Alex apparently was a huge eighties movie fan. The two of them watched the movie in near silence, Mangus did notice Alex sneaking his hand into his own. It was nice, the two of them just silently enjoying each other’s company. A rarity in Hotel Valhalla as they always had _something_ to do.   
  
Today was no exception, as Magnus's phone started to go off. He usually left it at the hotel, not being used to carrying one. With a sigh he reached over to the nightstand and grabbed the grey rectangle. He wondered why Annabeth would be calling him today, it was Percy’s birthday after all. Magnus was gonna call him later anyways. He answered the phone as Alex turned the TV down.   
  
“Is it Annabeth?” He asked with another raised eyebrow while turning to face Magnus.   
  
Magnus nodded as Annabeth nearly started to scream his ear off on the other line.   
  
“MAGNUS CHASE WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?” Annabeth yelled into the phone, causing the speaker to crackle a bit. Magnus could hear a group of people laughing in the background. “YOU COULD'VE GOTTEN HURT AND I KNOW YOUR ASS ISN’T ON A QUEST.”   
  
“Hey now! It was Alex’s idea!” Magnus deflected with a laugh. He knew Annabeth meant well.   
  
“THAT doesn’t make it better!” Annabeth said, her voice was clearly stressed. “What made Alex decide to get in a police chase anyways?”   
  
Magnus put the phone on speaker so Alex could reply.   
  
“Well, fuck the cops. That’s about it.” Alex spoke, trying his best not to laugh.   
  
“Well yes, I agree, but not in a way that puts your life in danger.” Annabeth tried to explain before Alex cut her off again.   
  
“The police are a waste of taxpayer dollars, fuck them. I don’t need to explain shit.” Alex crossed his arms and looked away, as if Annabeth was in the room with them. 

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN WASTE OF TAXPAYER DOLLARS?!” Annabeth yelled again, clearly confused as to what Alex even meant.   
  
Magnus clearly heard the laughter of Percy in the background, there was another laugh that sounded familiar. He thought it could be Frank Zhang, but he wasn’t sure. Having only met the Roman twice. Alex and Annabeth went back and forth a few times before Alex announced that he would explain everything after the obvious birthday party.   
  
“Wish the blue loving heretic happy birthday for me!” Magnus called out before hanging up.   
  
It took both of them a few moments before pulling themselves together after that ordeal. Magnus took a deep breath to slow his laughing and met Alex’s eyes. “Fucking great. “Waste of taxpayer dollars.” Where did you even get that?”   
  
Alex shrugged. “No idea Maggie, it’s not like it’s wrong y’know. Wanna start heading down for dinner?” He asked.   
  
Magnus nodded, food sounded great right about now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comment plz


	3. Wishing All Museums a Very Nice: “Give It Back” (Alex)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex notices an ad for a local museum that's displaying stolen artifacts from the Romans.
> 
> T.J decides to that now would be the best time to pull a prank.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A tad short, but this is just setting things up.
> 
> Readers of the Solangelo series might notice something...

##  **Alex:** **  
** **  
** **Wishing All Museums a Very Nice: “Give It Back”**

Dinner was nothing spectacular, Mallory and Halfborn got into a conversation about hating the British, which Alex approved of, but hearing about how many ways Mallory would disemboweled some SAS captain by the name of Albert Chambers with a wooden cooking spoon wasn’t helpful for trying to eat lunch. He could handle gore and violence, more than Magnus anyways, but when it came to trying to eat? Alex hated it. Food should be served without gory details.

Alex paid no mind to their conversations of torture and went back up to Magnus’s room with him. Alex flopped back down on Magnus’s bed and turned the T.V back on, he was expecting to still see things about the car chase from earlier. Instead it was playing some advertisement for one of the many museums around the city, for some reason. Alex ignored it and decided to see what the hell his boyfriend was up too.

Magnus was reaching into the mini-fridge for a half gallon of milk, he had already placed a bowl by the sink with a box of Cheerios.

“You just ate dinner.” Alex started. “Still hungry?” He asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Duh, after Mallory’s talk about...dismembering that guy with plastic cutlery I didn’t feel comfortable eating.” Magnus shrugged, he stopped what he was doing and went over to see what was on the T.V. “When did the art museum start playing ads?” Magnus cocked his head to the side.   
  
The ad was for the art museum’s newest exhibit, as the women on screen showed off a glass display case which held a large solid gold gear. While the gear was made of solid gold, Alex noticed that the women kept calling it bronze for some reason. Magnus shook his head a few times while watching.

“It’s not bronze is it?” He asked.

Alex shook his head. “Nah, that shit is solid gold for me. Glamour maybe?”  
  
A nod from Magnus. “Looks like Imperial Gold, it’s the metal the Romans use, Annabeth showed me some of it when I went to visit her. How did a museum get that?” He asked.

“Come on Maggie, theft. They stole it.” Alex stated in a sarcastic tone.

“Well, if they stole it. We should get it back.” Magnus went back to the bowl and started to pour some Cheerios in it. There was a loud clang, the sound of metal hitting ceramic and Alex glanced over. Magnus picked up a small olive green metal ball and sighed. “Oh...a frag grenade.”  
  
“A fucking what?” Alex jumped up to his feet, eyes wide staring at his boyfriend. 

Magnus held up the grenade. “See?” He muttered something before Alex decided that the best course of action at this very moment was to dive to the side of Magnus’s bed and take shelter. Shapeshifting into an animal or an insect didn’t even cross Alex’s mind as the entire hotel room shook with explosive energy.

Alex picked his head up from his hiding space. Where Magnus was just standing, there was now a massive crater with bits of Magnus’s body everywhere. It was such a gruesome sight, that Alex had to look away. He heard a young man’s bellowing laugh come from outside of the room. In stepped T.J, dressed in his usual Civil War uniform, laughing hysterically.   
  
“Woo, that was funny. Hey Alex!” T.J called out with a wave. “You gotta admit, that was a good one right?”   
  
Alex sighed and shook his head. “I was gonna talk to him about robbing a museum, but nooooo, you just had to put an M67 in his cereal.”

“Robbing a museum? Sounds fun, also catch.” T.J tossed a green ball at Alex. He knew what it was, another frag grenade. Alex could have shapeshifted into a bird and attempt to fly out, but he knew that the blast radius would get him. So Alex gave T.J the finger as the grenade exploded, killing him instantly.  
  
Alex made sure to get T.J back for this one, he had to wonder though.  
  
  
Where the hell did T.J even _get_ the grenades from?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also comment

**Author's Note:**

> Alex's car: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pontiac_Fiero
> 
> The Cassette Tape: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLxAH5ZKI5Z8vG2WHt6ChwntXvLH2AqrVe
> 
> As always, I love comments. So, uh...Comment.


End file.
